Be still as a mountain, move like a great river.

I went for a long run in the rain today. I love the feeling- being soaked head to toe, but without a chill; having the rain pour off the bill of my cap without touching my face; seeing and moving strongly through the water, instead of huddling under an umbrella and moving rapidly to shelter. Today I ran up and down the hills of my neighborhood, knowing I’d have the streets to myself because of the downfall; there were leaves everywhere, and water running furiously down the streets. It was calming, actually, and when I got home I practiced Tai Chi in front of our big window, watching the rain some more.

My greatest fear is something along the lines of losing my mind and going nutty- big time. And so I think one of the things I’m enjoying so much about Tai Chi is the process of letting go, before coming back stronger. In this context emptying the mind is essential for re-centering, and becoming more focused and strong. It’s amazing to me that it takes all one’s attention and energy to do this- to let go of everything: “Entire body transparent and empty,” as an ancient Tai Chi Chuan song goes. And then, later in the song: “Tigers roaring, monkeys screeching; Clear fountain, peaceful water.” This cultivated energy can be as strong as a tiger’s roar and as far as a monkey’s screech, but despite this strength, the mind is still clear. That’s what I want; I’m ready.